Today's PSA: Nudity Gone Wrong
/Public Service Announcement:
If one has to drive to the hospital in the wee hours of the morn and decides to take a shower a few hours later to perk oneself up (and maybe wash off that less than desirable but highly fragrant odour one may have discovered as it wafted under one's nose) one should make sure one locks the bathroom door before one strips down, tosses her bra into the air and hops into the shower stall.
If one doesn't do this one may be toweling off and drying one's er, private parts when a hospital janitor who doesn't speak a lick of English and may be slightly deaf, walks in to said bathroom right as one is whipping the towel above one's head while shaking one's bottom and singing "Baby Got Back."
The hospital janitor will grin while thanking his Gods for such divine luck while one blushes all the way to ones toes as one tries to cover up important naked parts before realizing one is A.) Standing in front of a big mirror reflecting prime hind real estate and several tattoos and B.) Trying to make a hand towel magically stretch to the size of a bath towel.
If this happens to one, expect the nurses working on the pediatric ward one's child is in to laugh and tease you about it for the duration of one's child's hospital stay.
Also expect the janitor to make several unnecessary trips to empty an already empty garbage bin in one's room and the cross-eyed male nurse who may or may not resemble Marilyn Manson to stop by with an alarming frequency just to inquire as to whether one needs something. Like a towel or a bar of soap.
This concludes today's public service announcement and marks the death of any dignity one may have once possessed.