Pass the Puns, Please
/It's a fine day for some stinky cheese. Allow me to offer you some of my most malodorous cheese.
I'm off to be attacked by the giant size mosquitos who make my flesh their buffet and my yard their home, while I fry under the heat of the blazing sun and lounge around, doing absolutely NOTHING on such a beautiful day.
Enjoy le fromage and your day!
Not many people know it, but the Devil actually wears a wig. You'd never know if you weren't told - it's a perfect fit. Anyway, down in the world of fire and brimstone one guy did find out, and he decided to have a little practical joke. So one night, he sneaks past the guardian demons and manages to get all the way into Satan's bed chamber, whereupon he steals the hair-piece and makes good his escape.
Well, of course the Devil was most displeased by this, and he rounds up his demons, and demands to know which of them had been so lazy as to let someone sneak past them. Naturally, none of them owns up, which makes him even madder: So he calls a general meeting of everyone the underworld: everyone has to attend.
The meeting is held in a huge cavern, and it's absolutely packed (except for the odd gap in the crowd, where there's a lava-pit or bottomless fissure in the floor). As Satan steps up to speak, everyone sees that he's got no hair, and peals of laughter start echoing out around the hall.
The devil bellows at them to be quiet, and a deadly hush falls.
"Whoever stole it," he shouts, "had better return it immediately!" And here he paused for effect...
"Or else there'll be Hell Toupee!"
(Even I'm cringing at that one!)
I'm off to be attacked by the giant size mosquitos who make my flesh their buffet and my yard their home, while I fry under the heat of the blazing sun and lounge around, doing absolutely NOTHING on such a beautiful day.
Enjoy le fromage and your day!
Not many people know it, but the Devil actually wears a wig. You'd never know if you weren't told - it's a perfect fit. Anyway, down in the world of fire and brimstone one guy did find out, and he decided to have a little practical joke. So one night, he sneaks past the guardian demons and manages to get all the way into Satan's bed chamber, whereupon he steals the hair-piece and makes good his escape.
Well, of course the Devil was most displeased by this, and he rounds up his demons, and demands to know which of them had been so lazy as to let someone sneak past them. Naturally, none of them owns up, which makes him even madder: So he calls a general meeting of everyone the underworld: everyone has to attend.
The meeting is held in a huge cavern, and it's absolutely packed (except for the odd gap in the crowd, where there's a lava-pit or bottomless fissure in the floor). As Satan steps up to speak, everyone sees that he's got no hair, and peals of laughter start echoing out around the hall.
The devil bellows at them to be quiet, and a deadly hush falls.
"Whoever stole it," he shouts, "had better return it immediately!" And here he paused for effect...
"Or else there'll be Hell Toupee!"
(Even I'm cringing at that one!)